Satire from a 100 Years AGO--A short humorous piece in the Pocahontas Times titled "$100 a Year."

 

Deplorable Don'ts: A Humorous Take on Life Advice

The term "Deplorable Don'ts" comes from a short humorous piece in the Pocahontas Times titled "$100 a Year." The piece presents a series of "don'ts" framed as bad advice, creating a comical effect through their absurdity and implied negative consequences. These "Deplorable Don'ts" offer a satirical commentary on common societal expectations and behaviors.

Here are some examples of "Deplorable Don'ts" from the source:

• Don't judge cigars and women by their wrappers. This "don't" plays on the idiom "Don't judge a book by its cover," humorously applying it to cigars and women to suggest that appearances can be deceiving.

• Don't try to kill two birds with one shotgun. This "don't" twists the common saying "Kill two birds with one stone," which advises efficiency. By advising against efficiency, it creates a humorous effect.

• Don't forget that the wisest bird occasionally roosts at the wrong time. This "don't" satirizes the idea of perfect wisdom, suggesting that even the wisest individuals can make mistakes.

• Don't forget a man by the name of Next-door neighbor, lie occasionally on your back to see if he is doing the same thing for you. This "don't" uses humor to caution against excessive trust and the potential for deception in social interactions.

• Don't request your grocer to supply you with butter of the 57th parallel, it may get too warm in transit. This "don't" mocks those with overly specific and impractical demands.

• Don't waste your time disputing figures. They seldom lie. This "don't" humorously acknowledges the power of numbers and statistics.

• Don't think because life is short that one set of good resolutions will last a lifetime. This "don't" pokes fun at the fleeting nature of New Year's resolutions and the tendency for people to abandon their goals.

Overall, the "Deplorable Don'ts" serve as a humorous and insightful reflection on human behavior and societal norms. By presenting bad advice with a straight face, the author cleverly exposes the absurdity of certain expectations and actions, encouraging readers to think critically about conventional wisdom.